Things I like about Jen.

This was another blog topic fed to me by my dear one.

Here are 31 things I like about Jen.  Arbitrary number, of course.

1. She is a fantastic writer.  She wrote me emails, missionary letters, AIM chats, lunch love notes and the like throughout our courtship which were well-thought-out and lovely to read.
2. She is thoughtful.  She sends people cookies, black beans, and cake mixes in the mail when their local grocery options are limited.  
3. She is an extraordinary cook.  She has a great command of a whisk and other kitchen paraphenalia, and can innovate upon a recipe to make it taste better.
4. She is compassionate.  Early in our marriage she brought up the idea of "giving a gift to Jesus" which really entailed giving financially for the benefit of the poor and needy.  I was touched.
5. She's a cautious driver.  Jen keeps the rules of the road and gives plenty of space to the hooligans who drive around here.  She even coaches to help this hooligan drive more courteously.
6. She is punctual.  When I have a place to be with Jen, we are never late.  It's quite nice to be early to meetings/classes/appointments, because then we get a good seat and can be calm.
7. She's got the softest skin.  This one is a little harder to observe if you're not nearby.  She passed on the soft skin gene to Blake also, who is kissably soft.
8. She has a sense of fashion.  Not only does that keep her snappily dressed, but it helps me up my game.  I receive compliments on days I wear clothing Jen picked out or purchased.
9. She's very intelligent.  She keeps up with current events among our nation and the nations of the world.  She knows the opinions of people I've never heard of, and knows why countries are hurting.
10. She's a cartophile.  Have you been to our house to see the Map of the World Showercurtain?  It's yet one more reason to take a long, warm shower when you come to New Engla nd.
11. Fall is her favorite season. I had never thought through my reasons to have a favorite season, because they all have something to offer.  But to a Mainer, the world is just crisper and more beautiful in fall.
12. Her hair.  Oh, her hair.  Have you seen it recently?  It shines, has a little curl, and she has discovered how to be the "hair whisperer" to make it into the most beautiful array of locks.
13. She is thrifty.  She can take $5 and turn it into something wonderful, through yard sales, thrifting, deal-hunting, or innovating with items on hand.  She's also willing to leave the money in the bank.
14. She is crafty.  And who doesn't like a craft?  She's handy with a glue gun, sewing machine, vinyl cutter, photo editing software, cross-stitch, and crochet hook.  Yeah, all of the above.
15. She likes to hand-stitch the bindings on her quilts.  Yeah, I didn't know what a binding was a few years ago.  But Jen has a knack for it, and makes some beautiful fabric creations.
16. She's got the cutest wrinkly-nose smile.  She used to do it alot more, but I guess I teased it away.  My comments weren't supposed to scare it into submission, but I don't see those wrinkles much anymore.
17. She's got compassion for children.  She doesn't even have to know them, and her heart swells up with desires for their well-being.  It grieves her soul when help is beyond her control.
18. She takes immaculate notes.  She was a research office secretary, then a Department secretary at BYU's business school, so she has a talent for connecting her ears to her hands to paper.
19. She can type like a hundred words per minute, or something obscenely fast, at least.  And she only uses 6 fingers, folks!  It's amazing.  I admire that she could use that skill to pump out college papers.
20. She wants me to succeed.  She urged me into my educational plan, she helps prep me for business meetings, she lets me try out new handyman projects to see if they work.
21. She has a beautiful alto singing voice.  We used to sing in the choir together, and it was lots of fun to be able to pick her voice out among the other altos.  I guess that comes of years of listening to her.
22. She can tickle the ivories, too!  It's one of my favorite things to brag about on Jen's behalf, and perhaps one of the things that embarrasses Jen the most when I tell them.  She really is talented.
23. She's humble about her skill-set.  Though, she really could give herself more credit for being awesome.  She is a woman so well-versed that she doesn't need to be shy about it, after all.
24. She gave me children.  That is to say, she and I are raising 2.5 sons together, and I love that she has dedicated her professional life to rearing them in love and righteousness.  I love that she loves them.
25. She shops with a grocery list.  This is no ordinary grocery list either.  It's based upon a weekly menu.  And charted out according the store floor-plan.  And has target prices for the produce aisle.
26. She can drive a stick-shift.  We honeymooned driving a Plymouth Sundance.  Then our first summer together, we borrowed the Justy.  Then we bought the Outback, the car of my dreams.
27. She wants me to have a garage.  To house my workshop.  And my canoe.  Which garage would naturally be attached to a house in a suburb or rural area.  In which we'll raise our posse of children.
28. She prioritizes clean sheets.  This means that I get that crisp fresh feeling on a regular basis and sleep well at night with the tight weave tickling my toes.
29. She enjoys charts.  Including my geeky charts about our family energy consumption, budget, or height.  She offers to help me create charts to help me organize for my calling at church, etc.
30. She appreciates antiques.  I see much beauty in things as they were, and really enjoy seeing things persist across generations.  Hand-me-down vintage clothing, old furniture, tools, appliances.  Neat!
31. She knows I love her.  The reason I like it is because knowing that she knows makes it so much easier to step aside from disagreements and refocus on the big picture sometimes.

Green Sheet Friday.

Black Friday?  Perhaps.  But forevermore, in my mind, this is Green Sheet Friday!
Ten Years ago today, on the day after Thanksgiving, Jennifer and I started colluding about how to prepare for a pending engagement and ultimately marriage.  We mutually decided that it was the path that our lives were destined to take, so ever-logically, we started drafting the factors that need to be under consideration to help make it happen.

We pulled out a green sheet of paper and began brainstorming.  Through the years, we've talked about "the green sheet", though I don't know that we've known where it was.  Recently, I stumbled upon it again.

As we look through it, it's interesting to see that our biggest concerns were finances and timing.  We trusted that everything else would take care of itself.  After 10 years, I can attest that we made it through the engagement and early marriage years successfully; finances have worked out and we've never had any regrets on the timing. 

On the back, we made "rules of engagement."  These flowed down from two courses I think.  First, we had a great bishop who counseled single adults to stay "out of the box."  The box was pretty much any private place where a couple was confined away from others.  So we had a few rules about being inclusive.  We had rules about respecting personal space and making the most of our time together.  Together, we felt the rules would put us in a place where we could have a respectful engagement that would keep us out of the box.  Since they include some cultural references that you might not get, and I wouldn't want to embarrass Jen, I've left of the actual images of the green sheet..

For the fun of it, we wrote down the responses of our friends as we told them, as follows, for those who can't read my script:

Jen and Joe (interested party): I just want you!

Steve (my roommate): Well good, Joe.  [eyes roll]

Joe's parents: I'm so happy for you.

Ben and family (apartment-mate): Well, it is tradition to ask permission.

Jen's parents: Oh you are?

Isaac (longtime friend): You're kidding, right?

Amy (Jen's best friend/coworker): ---Awww!

Jared (Joe's best friend):  I can't believe you.  I'll still have you for the next semester.

Shannon and Chris (engaged roommate):  Hahahah! Congratulations!

Matt Duke (the ward bachelor): Oh reaaaaally?

Jenn Alder (Jen's best friend/roommate): Ahhhhh!

Erin Steck (Jen's apartment-mate): --No. Way.

So that is the story of the Green Sheet.  The evidence is clear that everything Jen and Joe were bound to do would be thoughtful, methodical, and structured!

Happy 10 years of commitment, dear!

10 Odd Things Here.

Okay, let's play a game.  I'm going to show you a picture, and you'll have to write down 10 interesting things about the picture.  If you know me, you'll see some of the interesting things.

Some of the interesting things 

1.  I'm a bowtie wearer now, which didn't become a regular habit until about 5 years after this photo.  It was a borrowed clip-on bowtie, which I would never wear these days.

2.  This dance was the Deseret Towers Invitational... and were were a Heritage Halls crew.  This would be categorized as crashing the party, wouldn't it?

3.  My roommate (Justus) and I went out with "the Jen's", for which he had a crush and I had a crush.  As you can see, the crush has been realigned.

4.  Clarification:  I am told that this event was one coordinated by the female contingent, which is not all that unusual at BYU.  Though I probably had like a 5:1 ratio of asking vs. being asked for dates.

5.  I went on several dates with Jenn ("Eyes") through the year, and I think she still holds it against me that on one of those evenings, I was double booked with another date later in the evening (could've been a different night than this one, but still).

6.  There's some gal really excited to be peeking her way into the picture.

7.  For some reason, the only balloons in the scene are tied to our dates' wrists.  Easy to not get lost in a crowd, that's for sure.

8.  Seems like we're the only gents wearing hats.  With hats seem to have come with the shirts our dates are wearing.

9.  Those lights in the background look like they are in Thai or some middle eastern language.  Illusion?

10.  I bought a tux shirt a few years ago for events such as this, but A)  Jen seems to think the vertical silver strands sewn into it are tacky, and B) I haven't gotten Jen to go to a dance with me since we were married.


I think we ended up leaving before  too long, because DT just didn't know how to throw a party the way Heritage could.  Freshmen spend an aweful lot of time preparing for the social scene.

October Review

In October, we were so excited for Shara and Jackson to come visit for a week. Apparently, the brisk Wisconsin weather decided to follow them here, but we had a FANTASTIC time. It was a great Boston-in-the-Fall week together. Below are some fun moments from our visit to the Boston Children's Museum.

Here are some other October highlights---------------

Apple season was in full swing at our house--which provided Joe and Ian with some fantastic cooking opportunities. For the record, Ian owns two aprons.

A family in our ward had us over to carve pumpkins...it was quite impressive....

...and then Ian found the trampoline... =)

For Halloween, Ian was a "silly green monster." I thought he was adorable...but once again, we got our annual cold/ear infection at Halloween (it's the third year in a row), so he wasn't as into it as I'd hoped. Here are Ian and Joe at the ward Halloween party.

...And it wouldn't be right to show pictures of our family without pictures of Chester. =)

A Fair is a Veritable Smorgasbord

This post is about a week late, but I've been sidelined for most of the last five days or so....better late than never, eh?

We went to the Topsfield Fair--and I love fairs. Like, in ways that I can't even articulate. So I absolutely cannot even begin to describe how disappointing it is to go to a fair and Not Even Be Able to Stomach The FAIR FOOD. I'm sorry, but fried dough is one of the great pleasures of life, and I nearly cried when I looked at the vendors and realized that it didn't look good.

And that, folks, was my big takeaway from the fair this year. That, and the fact that a person who is fighting second trimester morning sickness should know better than to walk into a building labeled "POULTRY BARN."

But considering the fact that I love fairs--pregnant or otherwise--I had a great time. Joe and Ian had a blast. From the cow sculpted out of butter to the pig races to Ian making his own beeswax candle, it was a fantastic evening.

Witness: Time Flying

(other than the initial gasps in my head saying, "Wow. I used to fit into that dress," I think it's kind of cute, eh?)

On October 9, 1999, I went on my first date at BYU.....with a blond kid from Tennessee who claimed that I was his "first choice" for homecoming. (That part is still up for debate.....wouldn't you agree, Brianne?). I didn't know him well at all--I wasn't in his Freshman Academy group (heck, I wasn't in Freshman Academy at all), we didn't have any common classes, and we never really ran into each other during the day..... He did, however, live in a neighboring dorm and we did go to church together every Sunday and we did tend to pal around with the same group of people on the weekends.

He was safe, he was funny, he was a great overall choice for homecoming.

We were going on a train--as in, I would have to dance on a train--but it sounded fun, right? No matter how silly I looked? Right? (Please nod in agreement for the sake of my self esteem.)

Thank you.

And really, looking back, it was the perfect date. (Especially when I look back at a lot of mediocre-or-worse dates I endured at BYU before Joe and I started dating in 2002....I realize now that BYU men everywhere should have been a fly on the wall of that train that night. Or at the 7-11 in Heber when we got slurpees. Or in the car when it broke down on the way to Squaw Peak {scandalous...}).

And to think that I married that blond kid from Tennessee is the best part, I'd say. But I'm biased. Because I look at those pictures from that night and realize how lucky I got.

'Cause, lest you haven't paid attention during my years of blogging, I married myself a CATCH-of-a-man, I did.

(And today, as a present to you, Joseph, I officially forgive you for making me take that special library tour.)