On Encouragement

Perhaps among the most admirable, motivating character traits I could describe is encouragement.

I remember having my parents, teachers, grandparents, and other adults often give encouragement and advice.  These wise folks have told me that I was doing a good job, have nudged me along when I was feeling tired or insignificant, or have given me ideas for other approaches to try to solve my problems.  And you know what?  These types of remarks make a contribution to my life.

When in college, I remember a Sunday School class once where for some reason we were decomposing character traits of good teachers or good friends or whatever, and what I remember taking from that lesson is that there are people in this world that make me feel better about myself because they compliment regarding what I am good at doing.  These people are the first to notice successes and cheer others along even if they haven't been able to see the end of their quest yet.  There's a sense of gratitude for other people's efforts, regardless of the outcome.  Several men in my apartment building were masters of the art of encouragement, and they were positively a blessing to all of us peers.

I believe these words from a prophet of God, Elder Henry B. Eyring, (Oct, 2012, Help Them Aim High)

Every person is different and has a different contribution to make. No one is destined to fail. As you seek revelation to see gifts God sees in those you lead in the priesthood—particularly the young—you will be blessed to lift their sights to the service they can perform. With your guidance, those you lead will be able to see, want, and believe they can achieve their full potential for service in God’s kingdom.

Part of it I believe is like coaching.  You know, the "teaching the man to fish" paradigm.  Or if you aren't teaching him, at least you are motivating him to learn to fish.  The other part, I think is the principle of lifting a man when he is down.

The last couple of weeks, my spare-time Netflix show has been watching old seasons of Merlin, a BBC production of various adventures in Camelot, starring Colin Morgan.  It's over-the-top dramatically with alot of cliche script, but it really works for the series.  Since it is based on legend, when you listen to the delivery of the lines, you almost come to believe that the cliche is only cliche because the Arthurian legends is where it all began, and has been imitated ever since then.

Episode 3.2 as they are readying for battle against an enemy of Camelot, where they are estimated to be out-numbered 2 to 1, there is an uncharacteristic pep-talk that takes place between the prince and his servant.  In this series, Merlin is a "closeted" warlock, as magic is outlawed in Camelot.  Arthur believes Merlin to be a clumsy oaf, though it's really Merlin who secretly saves Arthur from a variety of dangerous circumstances.  When you read this, add a dramatic score in your mind, insert pauses and serious eyes staring between the characters.

Arthur:  It's not like you to get nervous, is it Merlin?
Merlin: I'm not nervous.
Arthur: No?
Merlin: Because I trust in your destiny.
Arthur: Have you been on the cider?
Merlin: {Draws sword to give to Arthur} It is your fate to be the greatest King Camelot has ever known.  And your victory today will be remembered by every age until the end of time.
Arthur: {Accepts sword.}
Merlin: Just trust in yourself.
[Long pause]
Arthur: There are times, Merlin, when you display a sort of-- I don't know what it is--What is it?--It's not wisdom--Yes.  That's what it is.
Don't look so pleased, the rest of the time you are a complete idiot.

These words were undoubtedly encouraging and strengthening.  The writers could have done better than this cheesy exchange, no doubt, but it works with the theme.  I guess to look at a nobler source, here are several quotes from the Bible under several related topics:


Don't be afraid Deut 31:6
17 For our light ^aaffliction, which is but for a moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and ^beternal ^cweight of glory;
18 While we look not at the things which are ^aseen, but at the things which are not seen: for the things which are seen aretemporal; but the things which are not ^bseen are ^ceternal.

6 Be strong and of a good ^acourage, fear not, nor be afraid of them: for the ^bLord thy God, he it is that doth go with thee; he will not ^cfail thee, nor ^dforsake thee.

It won't be so bad 1 Cor 10:13

13 There hath no temptation ^ataken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be^btempted above that ye are able; but will with the ^ctemptationalso make a way to ^descape, that ye may be able to ^ebear it.

Overcoming 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

16 For which cause we faint not; but though our outward man perish, yet the ^ainward man is renewed day by day.

Peace John 14:27

27 ^aPeace I leave with you, my ^bpeace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be ^ctroubled, neither let it be afraid.

Constancy Deuteronomy 7:9 

9 Know therefore that the Lord thy God, he is God, the faithful God, which ^akeepeth covenant and ^bmercy with them that love him and keep his commandments to a thousand generations;

Seems like there are lots of aspects to this.  On the person to person side, I suppose encouragement also includes being a good listener.  Yes, I feel most validated and encouraged when someone listens to me as though what I have to say is important.  It's a part of the interpersonal relationship that uplifts and inspires.